I was struggling today with the question of honor vs “sticks and stones”.

It seems pretty barbaric to the modern mind, yet there is something to the claim that “He called me a liar” is a good reason for a gun fight.  We are only as good as our word, so if someone questions our word, well, that’s assassination of our character.  It is a serious matter.

We say “sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me”, and there’s something to that as well.

We are individuals, and we are social creatures.  As an individual, I can shake off any insult you may cast my way.  But as a social creature, your insults can do far more harm to me than sticks and stones ever could.  If you convince the world that I am a liar, that does me real harm.  I can accomplish more with no arms in a community that trusts and respects me than I can with my own two arms in a community that does not trust or respect me.

There must be some reasonable balance between killing each other over minor insults and pretending that insults don’t really hurt.  But finding that balance is not easy.